⚡ Jason and Dick weren’t allowed TVs in their rooms until they were 14. They are extremely pissed off that Damian got one at 10.
⚡ When Damian repeats a word he doesn’t know the meaning of, he mimics the voice that said it. This is entirely unconscious, and no one quite has the heart to tell him he does it.
So this is based off In’s two posts about lying headcanons. Also, when I saw the notes and it said animegoil was interested in reading something like this, well I wrote it haha.
Title: Five Lies
Verse: headcanons (others)
Characters/Pairings: Jason, Damian, Dick, Tim, Bruce, Alfred, Steph, Cass, Babs
Rating: Jason
Excerpt: Bruce knows each of his boys lie. He’s taught them to. He’s slightly worried that Jason and Damian will take the lies too far one day.
This is… really HEARTBREAKING and ADORABLE. At Jason and Tim I was all upset, but at Dick and Damian I was cracking up laughing. OMG DICK YOU PRECIOUS BEING of course he would tell lies and then forget! And how no one takes Damian seriously omg babyyy let me cuddle you.
The uh, redeeming thing about Jason breaking my heart is that at least Bruce can always read his (poor) poker face. He’s like “Omg ihu Bruce” and Bruce is like “YEP OKAY I BELIEVE YOU, OW MY MAN-FEELINGS” /wink. (I am not going to talk about Tim except to say ouch.)
But no really, I am insanely glad that my dumb posts keep inspiring awesome stuff like this. <3
Anon asked:
Is there any unofficial right of passage to being Robin?
If you were to ask the boys, they’d say absolutely there is. They’d say, when you work alone with Gordon for the first time. Or cross-dressing for the mission. Saving Batman, instead of vice versa. Getting spat on or maced by the people you’re trying to help.
But really, they were all such different Robins. They were all trained and treated very differently. The moment each of them really felt like Robin were these;
For Dick, it was the first time he went out in his colours with B’s permission. He felt like Robin from the get-go, because he was the first. His name, his colours. He wasn’t trying to fill anyone’s shoes, or to replicate anyone else. He knew he was nothing like Batman, he didn’t have to try be anyone but himself.
For Jason, it was stopping some crooks in Crime Alley. He wound up nearby some working girls, some girls he’d known in his time on the streets, had seen around a hundred times. And one of them called out, “Thanks, Robin!” and he was so stunned he was nearly clubbed from behind. Because he wasn’t a nobody anymore, a no-good kid with a smart mouth and quick hands who got bounced around foster care ‘til he ran away. He was Robin, Batman’s partner. He helped people.
For Tim, it was two brusque syllables over Batman’s shoulder– “Good job.”
For Damian, it was when Dick let him out without the leash. He’d said, ruffling Damian’s hair with a leather gauntlet, “Good luck, little Robin. Call me if you get in too deep. I trust you.” And the thing was, he meant it. It was one thing to be a child assassin in a stupid costume, but it was an entirely different thing to actually. Well, be Robin. To be someone Batman believed in. And Damian loved the feeling.
⚡ The boys share an odd sort of camaraderie that means they never give each other up to Bruce or Alfred. Whatever happens between them stays between them. This is a lesson Damian learned, and learned hard in his first months at the Manor.
protagonistically said: Ummm… I’m so terrible at prompts. How about the first time Tim meets Titus? SoHTdsouth. I’m so happy you have writing time!!! <3
Characters: Tim, Bruce, Alfred. Titus.
Pro, I am cheating a bit on your prompt. This isn’t the first time Tim meets Titus, it’s just… how I imagine Tim would treat him whenever he sees him! What angst shh oh god this was supposed to be fluff nooo everything Pro touches turns to Bruce/Tim angst
—
Anon asked:
How good at lying are the other Batchildren? :)
After I posted this headcanon.
I want to make the distinction between “lying” and “keeping civilian IDs a secret”, though. I am talking about other lies that Bruce hasn’t trained them to tell.
Damian doesn’t really have the tact to be a good liar. I mean, mostly, he’s a pretty blunt kid, so he doesn’t tend to lie often. He tells some lies which are entirely transparent, (“Why do you even bother coming back, Grayson? It’s not like anyone misses you”, “I am tired of you butting into my business, Pennyworth”, “I do not care what my father thinks of me”), but they hardly count.
He is also stubborn; he doesn’t want to be seen in a bad light, but he also refuses to lie about who he is. No apology and no compromise! Because of this, when he does lie it’s usually really obvious. For all his flaws, he is not that devious.
(In spite of being bad at lying, Damian is good at acting the part of a child for reporters and at functions. I do think this is different to lying outright.)
Dick is a notoriously bad liar. His family make fun of him for his terrible poker face. Dick is a sincere person by nature, absolutely guileless. Depending on the lie, he might go red while he’s telling it. He’s also, um, a bit too dim to lie? At least to the rest of the Bats, I mean. When he was a kid, he wanted to go to a concert with Wally, and Bruce said no. So he went anyway– snuck out, told no one, had a great time– not only did he forget to act annoyed that Bruce hadn’t let him go, he brought back a band t-shirt and an incriminating stack of polaroids. Bruce was so embarrassed on his behalf at this attempt at deception that Dick hardly got into any trouble.
He is slightly better at lying to people outside the family (he’d have to be), but to people who know him well, he’s an open-book. Dick is terrible at hiding things.
Tim is a better liar than Bruce.
Tim lies like breathing– every day, like second nature. Tim can be standing in a room alone and he’s lying. Tim opens his mouth and lies fall out. Tim lies to Batman.
He has a virtually unreadable poker-face, and he has to be pretty frazzled to show one of his very few tells. It takes him a long time to let down his guard and be himself, to stop lying, and sadly, just about every time he tries to around his family, they are assholes about it (Quitting/being replaced, his 16th, Dick replacing him). It always takes him a while to try being honest again.
He doesn’t lie to Alfred, though.
There’s a lot of stuff I want to write, and I’ve got some free time.
But I’m intensely indecisive, feeling kind of down, and also have writer’s block.
⚡ Jay has a shit poker face, because as soon as he realises he’s lying convincingly he grins.
He was much worse as a kid.
⚡ After being tested for autism as a child, Tim went to the public library to research the appropriate amount of time to hold eye-contact. Sometimes, he still catches himself counting seconds.
Since then, he’s had a lot of practice hiding his intelligence (because being clever intimidates and alienates people– nobody likes a smart little boy).
